Let’s try an experiment.

I’ve caught myself trying to do it at least 15 times.

I’ve realized that many accounts I have (Pinterest, Time Hop, Spotify) are hooked to it, thus blocking my path until I changed some log-in info around.

I’ve had two people text me, asking if I’m ok because it’s gone.

It’s dawned on me how truly dependent I am on it – thus further driving the point home that what I’m doing at the mo is the right thing.

I’ve temporarily deactivated my Facebook.

I’ve seen friends take on this noble challenge before. Some come back after a couple days, some not for months, and a few brave (and commendable) souls, not at all.

It’ll be a week for me. It’s happening because I realize I invest a sickening amount of time into endless scrolling and nosing about in others’ lives, as well as cultivating a shining portrait of my own. My own life has smudges, and plenty of them, even though I am overall happy – but you’ll never see ’em. I find joy in “likes” and comments, far too much of it. I love knowing what other people are up to – but sometimes for the wrong reasons (though I do feel it’s mostly out of pure enjoyment coming from others’ happiness).

So I got rid of it until next Sunday. Last night as Boy and I sat next to each other to watch TV I found myself reaching for it to fill silent voids. Today as I work and need a mental break I find myself typing it in the search bar. I reach to click the app on my phone while stopped at a light on my lunch break.

Why? Do I need it that much? Apparently, so it stops here.

Yes, I will go back to it. I do rely on it somewhat for both my full-time job and freelance work, I have incredible friends on there that are far flung who I like to keep up with regularly and I have the majority of my family members at my fingertips, all the more important now that I’ve moved four states northeast.

But maybe when I creep back, after seeing how this whole week felt (I’ve filled that void with coloring, writing and practicing French already, a mere 24 hours after I bid farewell) I won’t need it so badly. It’ll be a once-daily check, not an every 15 minutes.

And if not? Two weeks deactivated it is.

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